Dear God,

I am at a place where I cant seem to find my way... I don't know what I am supposed to do next...
I hate feeling this way, and I hate no being able to let go... Am I supposed to continue to hang on? Am I supposed to live my life waiting and hoping for something that may never happen?
When is it that this will be over? When do I get the chance to look back and see where I have finally arrived? when I get to see my journey in full and understand all my pain and anguish?
I keep repeating your words God in Isaiah 38:17, it says, "Surely it was for my benefit that I suffered such anguish. In your love you kept me from a pit of destruction..." I know full well that my suffering is leading me to my own betterment... but can I ask when will I recover? when will I see the benefits?
I love you... I know that you want what is best for me and you know what I need and I want nothing less... I am just hurting now Lord and I need your comfort... I need to see where I am going... But regardless of what happens I am here to follow you whether it is to the ends of the earth or just around the corner...
Just remember my heart God... it is hurting so badly Amen.

Goodbye... For Now...or Forever...

I have so many people in my life who lift me up... who help me find hope in all the small wonderful things God has blessed me with...all the things He has given me and ALL He has taken away...
Someone amazing in my life told me that I have been "painfully pruned" and that I am beginning to blossom...
I hope so...I am absolutely ready to blossom... I am ready for what lies ahead...there are many things I hope are in my future, but I am also aware that there may be a few things that are not...as painful as it may be to let those things go, I know I can do it...If God has taken them away...there must be a reason...
I truly pray that what has been removed, due to my own selfishness, will flourish and succeed beyond all that was planned... I hope and pray that many blessings fall upon them and God leads their lives to places where they can do His work...
I will continue to move on... I will continue to step forward... no turning back... no standing still... I will no longer grieve the loss...but instead rejoice in it, for if God removed it ... that is what was intended...and if he didn't remove it he will restore it...For God is a God of restoration...and I KNOW that what is in store for the rest of my life in Greatness... I KNOW that God is going to take me to the ends of the earth to do his work... and I am ready... For God did not give me a spirit of timidity but instead gave me a spirit of POWER of LOVE and of SELF DISCIPLINE!